Three Men in a Boat by Jerome

Title: Three Men in a Boat (To Say Nothing of the Dog)

Author: Jerome K. Jerome (English, 1859-1927)
Originally published: 1889



Page count: 145
Dates read: 9/22/19-9/24/19
Back to the Classics category: Classic Comedy




Read my other book reviews for the challenge HERE.



Description on back of book:
A masterpiece of British humor since its first publication in 1889. The funny boating trip of three men - Jerome and his two friends Harris and George and their dog Montmorency - along the River Thames in Oxford, crossing absurdities and traditions of late 19th century England.

Review:

I WAS going to read this as my second book for the Classic Comedy category of the Back to the Classics reading challenge, but it just was not interesting to me. I read a quarter of the book, which was five chapters, and then decided to stop. I have so many books I want to read - I just don't have time to spend on books I don't enjoy.

To be fair, there were some funny things in the first two chapters - but I quickly got bored with the humor. There didn't seem to be much of a plot and I didn't like the characters. It would follow the story for a page or two and then go off on some supposedly funny anecdotal tangent that has little to do with the actual story (and was usually about three or four pages long). I just wasn't a fan of the writing and I just didn't want to waste my time. Maybe I was just in the wrong mood.

But...Why didn't you finish the book?!

Now I'm off to read another book... but since a review should be more about the author of the book than about the writer of the blog, I will let Jerome K Jerome have the last words. These are the first two sentences of the book:

"There were four of us -George, and William Samuel Harris, and myself, and Montmorency. We were sitting in my room, smoking, and talking about how bad we were - bad from a medical point of view I mean, of course."

Why Didn't You finish the Book?

Why didn't you finish the book? In the past, I have felt guilty if I didn't finish all the books I started - maybe you've felt that way too. I thought I owed it to the book to finish it because the ending might make a so-so book really good. The thing is, I think what we really should be asking is:

Why DID you finish a book (that you didn't like)?
-It was assigned reading for class.
-It is part of your job description (most likely in academia).
-You want to speak intelligently about why you don't like a book (and in order to do that, you have to read the whole book).
*Note: If you have another reason - post it in the comments!

Those are really the only legitimate reasons I can think of to finish a book you don't like reading. Well, since I'm no longer in school and my job doesn't require the reading of novels (unfortunately), the first two reasons don't apply to me. Though I appreciate the intention behind the third reason, I don't know if you actually have to finish the book to talk intelligently about why you didn't like. I also don't know why one couldn't just say 'I didn't like it' and leave it at that.

The thing is, since I'm not reading for school or work, I'm reading in my free-time for FUN. If I'm not enjoying the book, then it's not all that fun. I don't owe it to anyone (or the book) to finish it if I don't feel like it. Just because a whole bunch of other people might like the book, it doesn't mean I (or you) have to. But what if the book turns around and has a good ending?! Well - is it worth it to drudge through a couple HUNDRED pages to get a couple of pages of a good ending? Maybe it is to you - but not to me.

At the same time, I do think that it's good to give a book a fair try. Of course, what is 'fair?' Well, I've decided to come up with a little system to help me - because I'm weird and I want to feel like I'm treating all the books I read fairly. I have a system that goes by how long the book is:

Step 1: Give the book a chance
I highly suggest reading a certain portion of each book you decide to start - your first impression may change (for better or for worse). If there's something about the book you just don't like about it, then stop reading the book however far into it you are. This system is for books that you find kinda boring, or meh, or think 'maybe it'll get better' - but nothing is really gripping you yet. If the book is:

100 pages or less - Just finish it since it's so short.

100-400 pages - Read the first quarter of the book.

400-600 pages - Read the first 100 pages.

600 pages or more - Read the first 200 pages.

Step 2: Decide if the book has potential
If you really don't like the book at this point, then stop reading it. If you still are unsure about the book but think it has potential, then continue reading up to half of the book.

Step 3: Decide if you will finish the book
If at any point from the page amount in Step 1 up to half the book you decide you really don't like it, then stop reading the book. If you decide you like the book (or that it has a high enough potential), then continue reading the book. Note: If I read beyond the halfway point, I'll finish the book.

There you have it! The system is pretty simple.

One more thing: Don't ever feel like you have to reread a book that you never finished or that left a really bad impression on you. (For me, it's The Great Gatsby from high school and, more recently, Atlas Shrugged.) BUT just because you don't like a book today, doesn't mean you won't like the book tomorrow (or sometime further in the future). There have been plenty of books I was assigned in high school that I didn't really like, but I've reread them recently and discovered I greatly enjoyed them! You might not like a book because you're in the wrong mood, you're at the wrong point of your life, or something is just going over your head. Don't be afraid to give a book you didn't like a second chance!

Books I started but didn't finish:
-20,000 Leagues Under the Sea by Jules Verne
-The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
-Frankenstein by Mary Shelley

-"Pauline's Passion and Punishment" by Louisa May Alcott
-Three Men in a Boat by Jerome K Jerome

-The Brave African Huntress by Amos Tutuola

-The Idylls of the King by Lord Alfred Tennyson

Books I finished but wish I hadn't wasted my time:
-Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand
-The Bostonians by Henry James
-The Catcher in the Rye by JD Salinger
-The Great Gatsby by F Scott Fitzgerald
-Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte

The Cricket on the Hearth by Dickens

Title: The Cricket on the Hearth


Author: Charles Dickens (English, 1812-1870)
Originally published:  1845
Page count: 91 (Av. of several versions: 110)


Dates read: 9/16/19-9/22/19
2019 book goal progress: 27 out of 41
Back to the Classics category: 
Classic Novella (under 250 pages)

Read my other Dickens at Christmas reviews HERE.

Read my other book reviews for the challenge HERE.


Description on back of book:
John Peerybingle, a carrier, lives with his young wife Dot, their baby boy and their nanny Tilly Slowboy. A cricket constantly chirps on the hearth and acts as a guardian angel to the family. One day a mysterious elderly stranger comes to visit and takes up lodging at Peerybingle's house for a few days.

First sentence:
"The kettle began it!"

Favorite quotes:
 "To have a Cricket on the Hearth is the luckiest thing in all the world!"

"You're such an undeniable good sleeper, sir, that I have half a mind to ask you where the other six are - only that would be a joke, and I know I should spoil it. Very near though, very near!"

"Caleb was no sorcerer, but in the only magic art that still remains to us, the magic of devoted, deathless love."

CAWPILE Rating: Overall - 8 - ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Characters      - 10
Atmosphere   - 8
Writing Style - 9
Plot                - 8
Intrigue          - 9
Logic             - 4
Enjoyment     - 8
What is a CAWPILE Rating?

Review:

This is a great fairy-tale story. It's almost too good to be true - but aren't most Christmas stories? This story is included in Dickens' 5 Christmas books, but it actually happens at the end of January and doesn't involve Christmas at all. (Though there is a Scrooge-like character, as well as toymakers!) The book is really about love and marriage. It opens with this wonderful personification of the kettle which made me fall in love with the story. To be fair, there were some parts that did confuse me and other parts I think the story would have been better without - but it was a great read overall. Dickens is an amazing writer that writes prose like it's poetry - I laughed, I cried, and my heart was warmed.

Now I'm off to read another book... but since a review should be more about the author of the book than about the writer of the blog, I will let Charles Dickens have the last words:

"All Crickets are potent Spirits, even though the people who hold converse with them do not know it (which is frequently the case); and there are not in the unseen world, voices more gentle and more true, that may be so implicitly relied on, or that are so certain to give none but tenderest counsel, as the Voices in which the Spirits of the Fireside and the Hearth address themselves to humankind."

But... WAIT! I have a question about the ending! The very last paragraph to be exact. I hope some of you reading this blog have read The Cricket on the Hearth for yourselves and will give me some insight on the ending.

Warning: the following contains spoilers (and the comments might have spoilers as well).

When I first read the last paragraph, I interpreted that the narrator as John and that the happy ending had all just been a vision from the cricket and that Dot had left him after all. But then I thought about how the Cricket was portrayed as a lucky and positive being and that kind of trickery just didn't seem to fit a Cricket's character. Then I thought maybe the narrator is Tilly and the last paragraph happened after everyone went to bed after the party and she was still sitting by the fire - this allows for the happy ending, but also doesn't really add anything to the story. It doesn't seem to fit.

Then I thought - what if the Cricket is the narrator? That also would allow for a happy ending and would give the story a deeper meaning than if it was Tilly. The problem was that either there's a second Cricket in the home or the Cricket speaks about itself in the third person - so maybe the Cricket isn't the narrator. Then I thought more abstract - what if the narrator is the hearth itself, which symbolizes the home, which symbolizes the love of those who live within? This would give the ending even more meaning. But... is that too abstract?

I think my main issue is the very last sentence: "A Cricket sings upon the Hearth; a broken child's toy lies upon the ground; and nothing else remains."  I initially took this to be negative, but maybe it means 'Nothing else remains but luck (Cricket), love (Hearth), and the hard work of life/marriage (broken toy).' Or maybe it isn't as abstract as I'm making it and it means 'nothing else remains to be told,' or 'they all lived happily ever after,' or simply 'the end.' If any of these be the case, then maybe John is the narrator after all - but I kind of like the narrator being the heart/home/love.

Now that I've explained the confusion I have over the ending, I want to ask two questions: Who do you think the narrator is? How did you interpret the last paragraph?

Four Comedies by William Shakespeare

Title: Four Comedies: 

The Taming of the Shrew, 

A  Midsummer Night's Dream, 

As You Like It, 

and Twelfth Night

(Originally written in Early Modern English)

Author: William Shakespeare (English, 1564-1616)
Originally written: ~1590-1601
Page count: 150, 100, 115, 113

Dates read: 9/5/19-9/15/19
2019 book goal progress: 26 out of 41
Back to the Classics category: Classic Play

Read my other book reviews for the challenge HERE.


The Taming of the Shrew
Description on back of book:
Lucentio loves Bianca but cannot court her until her shrewish older sister Katherina marries. The eccentric Petruchio marries the reluctant Katherina and uses a number of tactics to render her an obedient wife.

CAWPILE Rating: Overall - 6.7 - ⭐⭐⭐
Characters      - 6
Atmosphere   - 6
Writing Style - 9
Plot                - 8
Intrigue          - 8
Logic             - 4
Enjoyment     - 6
What is a CAWPILE Rating?

Review:
I was excited to read this - I had read it before, I love the movie Ten Things I Hate About You, and, in high school, I was in a performance of Kiss Me, Kate. Unfortunately, the rereading of the play did not live up to my memory. I greatly enjoyed it up to the point of Katherina and Petruchio getting married.

I thought Kate was a strong character and, though I expected her to slowly change, she abruptly changed after she was married - and the way Petruchio went about 'taming' her was abusive. The play started out as this hilarious multi-dimensional story with characters in disguise, but, by the end, it became an insipid patriarchal and sexist narrative. I know it was written long ago in a different culture, but it just fell flat for me.

Favorite lines:
LORD:
And if the boy have not a woman's gift
To rain a shower of commanded tears,
An onion will do well for such a shift,
Which in a napkin being close conveyed,
Shall in despite enforce a watery eye.
...

PETRUCHIO:
Father, and wife, and gentlemen, adieu,
I will to Venice - Sunday comes apace.
We will have rings, and things, and fine array,
And kiss me, Kate, we will be married o' Sunday.

A Midsummer Night's Dream
Description on back of book:
Four Athenians run away to the forest only to have Puck the fairy make both of the boys fall in love with the same girl. The four run through the forest pursuing each other while Puck helps his master play a trick on the fairy queen.

CAWPILE Rating: Overall - 5.9 - ⭐⭐⭐
Characters      - 4
Atmosphere   - 5
Writing Style - 9
Plot                - 7
Intrigue          - 7
Logic             - 4
Enjoyment     - 5

Review:
I've read this before but didn't remember much other than a feeling of meh. Rereading the play didn't change my feeling towards it. I think I would've enjoyed the book more if it didn't open with a father arranging his daughter's marriage and threatening: if she didn't go along with it, she'll live as a nun the rest of her life and never marry, or she'll die. Well, again with the sexism. I know - it's a different time and culture, but it irritated me.

This opening left me in the wrong mood while reading the rest of the play and I took it more seriously than I should've. (Since it's a comedy, I should've taken the play in jest - but I couldn't.) There were parts that confused me and one of the (supposedly) funniest parts was when a trickster turns a man's head into a donkey head - I found that to be more stupid than silly. I'm not a fan of this play.

Favorite lines:
HELENA:
Things base and vile, holding no quality,
Love can transpose to form and dignity.
Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind,
And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.
...

BOTTOM: The eye of man hath not heard,  the ear of man hath not seen, man's hand is not able to taste, his tongue to conceive, nor his heart to report what my dream was!

As You Like It
Description on back of book:
Rosalind and her cousin escape into the forest and find Orlando, Rosalind's love. Disguised as a boy shepherd, Rosalind has Orlando woo her under the guise of "curing" him of his love.

CAWPILE Rating: Overall - 7.9 - ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Characters      - 9
Atmosphere   - 7
Writing Style - 9
Plot                - 8
Intrigue          - 7
Logic             - 7
Enjoyment     - 8

Review:
I have read this before, though I did not remember anything about it - including what I felt towards it. Well, this one was far better than the previous two I read. Rosalind was a strong character throughout - to the point, dare I say, I might consider this play feminist. My favorite character was Touchstone, who's supposed to be a clown/fool, but was probably one of the wisest throughout. This play was definitely enjoyable.

Favorite lines:
ADAM:
At seventeen years many their fortunes seek,
But at fourscore it is too late a week.
Yet fortune cannot recompense me better
Than to die well, and not my master's debtor.
...

JAQUES: By my troth, I was seeking for a fool when I found you.
ORLANDO: He is drowned in the brook; look but in and you shall see him.
JAQUES: There I shall see mine own figure.
ORLANDO: Which I take to be either a fool or a cipher.

Twelfth Night
Description on back of book:
Viola, separated from her twin Sebastian, dresses as a boy and works for Duke Orsino, with whom she falls in love with. Orsino is in love with Countess Olivia and sends Viola to court her for him, but Olivia falls for Viola instead. Sebastian arrives, causing a flood of mistaken identity.

CAWPILE Rating: Overall - 7.3 - ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Characters      - 7
Atmosphere   - 6
Writing Style - 8
Plot                - 8
Intrigue          - 8
Logic             - 7
Enjoyment     - 7

Review:
I was excited for this play since I've read it before and I love the movie She's the Man. The play was fine, but I didn't find it as humorous as the film, nor as witty as the other 3 plays. It was not sexist like the first two plays, but not quite as enjoyable as As You Like It. Overall it was a good read, but it's a story that loses some of its enjoyment the more familiar one is with it. The plot twists are what make this play so great and if you already know them, the element of surprise is gone - thus lowering the level of enjoyment.

Favorite lines:
FESTE: A sentence is but a cheveril (leather) glove to a good wit; how quickly the wrong side may be turned outward!
...

VIOLA:
By innocence I swear, and by my youth,
I have one heart, one bosom, and one truth.
And that no woman has, nor never none
Shall mistress be of it, save I alone.
And so, adieu, good madam; never more
Will I my master's tears to you deplore.

Conclusion:

I like how Shakespeare writes in rhymes - it's all very poetic. His wit is very humorous and I love his play on words. Out of these four plays, As You Like It is definitely my favorite and I would suggest reading it. If you enjoy that play you can continue onto Twelfth Night. If you want to read more Shakespeare, by all means, go ahead... but I suggest passing on The Taming of the Shrew and A Midsummer Night's Dream - they're not worth reading.

Each play had about a 45-page introduction and I confess that I didn't read them. They bored me to the point where I almost didn't read the plays at all. I'm glad that I decided to just skip to the plays because I did enjoy rereading Shakespeare, even if I did not enjoy the plays as much as I thought I would. Maybe I'll have a better feeling towards his tragedies than I do for his comedies...

Now I'm off to read another book... but since a review should be more about the author of the book than about the writer of the blog, I will let William Shakespeare have the last words:

"And though she be but little, she is fierce." -A Midsummer Night's Dream

"All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and entrances, and one man in his time plays many parts." -As You Like It

"The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool." -As You Like It

"Be not afraid of greatness. Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon 'em." -Twelfth Night

We by Yevgeny Zamyatin

Title: We

(Originally written in Russian)


Author: Yevgeny Zamyatin (Russian, 1884-1937)
Originally published: 1921
Page count: 153


Dates read: 8/27/19-9/4/19
2019 book goal progress: 22 out of 41
Back to the Classics category: Classic in Translation


Read my other book reviews for the challenge HERE.



Description on back of book:
We is set in the far-flung future well after a war that had lasted two-hundred years. D-503 lives in the One State, a lone city constructed almost entirely of glass so that the State can keep an eye on the citizens at all times. Life is organized by the hour in order to maximize proficiency and output from every inhabitant. People walk in step with each other and wear identical clothing with badges with their numbers/names for easy identification by the State's agents. 'I' is not allowed. Only 'We' exists.

First sentence:
"I shall simply copy, word for word, the proclamation that appeared today in the One State Gazette."

Favorite quotes:
"The ancient humaneness forbade the killing of a single individual, but not the partial killing of millions day by day. To kill one individual, that is, to diminish the total sum of human lives by fifty years, was considered criminal. But to diminish the sum of human lives by fifty million years was not considered criminal. Isn't that absurd?" (I can't help but think of climate change, even if that wasn't what he was referring to.)

"The sky is hidden by a milky-golden veil and you cannot see what is above, beyond it. The ancients knew that God - their greatest, bored skeptic - was there. We know that there is only a crystal-blue, naked, indecent nothing. But now I do not know what is there: I have learned too much. Knowledge, absolutely sure of its infallibility, is faith."

"Why do you think that foolishness is bad? If human foolishness had been carefully nurtured and cultivated as intelligence has been for centuries, perhaps it would have turned into something extremely precious." (Now read the line again, but replace 'foolishness' with 'imagination/creativity.')

CAWPILE Rating: Overall - 8 - ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Characters      - 8
Atmosphere   - 8
Writing Style - 7
Plot                - 9
Intrigue          - 9
Logic             - 7
Enjoyment     - 8
What is a CAWPILE Rating?

Review:

I enjoyed this read a great deal. 'People' is not used throughout the whole book, instead everyone is referred to as 'numbers.' All names are numbers. The main character is D-503 and other significant characters are O-90, R-13, and I-330. Males start with constants and females with vowels. Everyone is bald and has the same nose. The whole city is enclosed in glass and everything is viewable by everyone else. There are flying cars called aeros and they're working on building a space ship called the Integral.

I do want to mention that my copy was "published by Two-Gunner Pulp Press - 2017." The formatting and grammar are atrocious. Though I was quickly drawn into the narrative, I was always questioning. if the formatting is so bad, how accurate the translation of the actual story is. If you decide to read this, which I definitely think you should, I would highly suggest getting a different version of the book.

The story itself did a good job describing the new world to its readers and slowly revealed the underground revolution. I liked how it was written in the style of a diary that had an entry each day. It did end on a sad note, but that's to be expected with dystopian literature.

Now I'm off to read another book... but since a review should be more about the author of the book than about the writer of the blog, I will let Yevgeny Zamyatin have the last words:

"A human being is like a novel: until the last page, you don't know how it will end. Or it wouldn't be worth reading."

Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte

Title: Jane Eyre


Author: Charlotte Bronte (English, 1816-1855)
Originally published:  1847
Page count: 416


Dates read: 8/8/19-8/27/19
2019 book goal progress: 21 out of 41
Back to the Classics category: 
Classic by a Female Author

Read my other Bronte Sister book reviews.
Read my other book reviews for the challenge HERE.


Description on back of book:
Orphaned as a child, Jane has felt an outcast her whole young life. Her courage is tested once again when she arrives at Thornfield Hall, where she has been hired by the brooding, proud Edward Rochester to care for his ward Adèle. Jane finds herself drawn to his troubled yet kind spirit. But there is a terrifying secret inside the gloomy, forbidding Thornfield Hall. Is Rochester hiding something from Jane? Will Jane be left heartbroken and exiled once again?

The novel contains elements of social criticism, with a strong sense of morality at its core, but is nonetheless a novel many consider ahead of its time given the individualistic character of Jane and the novel's exploration of classism, sexuality, religion, and proto-feminism.

First sentence:
"There was no possibility of taking a walk that day."

Favorite quotes:
"It is far better to endure patiently a smart which nobody feels but yourself, than to commit a hasty action whose evil consequences will extend to all connected to you - and, besides, the Bible bids us return good for evil."

"Women are supposed to be very calm generally: but women feel just as men feel; they need exercise for their faculties, and a field for their efforts as much as their brothers do; they suffer from too rigid a restraint, too absolute a stagnation, precisely as men would suffer; and it is narrow-minded in their more privileged fellow-creatures to say that they ought to confine themselves to making puddings and knitting stockings, to playing on the piano and embroidering bags. It is thoughtless to condemn them, or laugh at them, if they seek to do more or learn more than custom has pronounced necessary for their sex."

"Feeling without judgment is a washy draught indeed; but judgment untempered by feeling is too bitter and husky a morsel for human deglutition."

"Laws and principles are not for the times when there is no temptation: they are for such moments as this, when body and soul rise in mutiny against their rigour; stringent are they; inviolate they shall be. If at my individual convenience I might break them, what would be their worth?"

CAWPILE Rating: Overall - 9.6 - ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Characters      - 9
Atmosphere   - 9
Writing Style - 10
Plot                - 10
Intrigue          - 10
Logic             - 9
Enjoyment     - 10
What is a CAWPILE Rating?

Review:

This is the third or fourth time I've read Jane Eyre - which says a lot. I have so many books I want to read that I rarely spend the time to read a book more than once. That being said, this is probably one of my favorite books! It's about an orphan girl who rises above her situations, which are often dreadful. The book has friendship and romance, intrigue and mystery, horror and tragedy, as well as loss and reconciliation. It really is a great read, if a bit black-and-white, and I suggest everyone should read it at least once.

Jane is an extremely strong character and, yet, docile at the same time - she's not interested in extravagance, she feels strongly, she expresses herself in a straightforward way, and she cares deeply about doing what's right. I identify with her in many ways - which is probably, at least partially, why I enjoy the book so much - and I love her representation of feminism.

Jane is proposed to by two men. One who loves her and she loves him, but when a secret he withheld is revealed, their relationship is inevitably altered and Jane leaves him. The other does not love her nor does she have a wife's love for him, but they would work together as missionaries trying to do as good work as possible. In addition to being unloving, he is also passive-aggressively abusive and quite manipulative. It is no wonder that, after she had time to think over the revealed secret, Jane returns to her first love to discover what became of him after she left.

Now I'm off to read another book... but since a review should be more about the author of the book than about the writer of the blog, I will let Charlotte Bronte have the last words:

(Note: The book does not have much humor, but I enjoyed the little it had. The following is a conversation between a School Master and Jane, who is 10 years old at the time.)

"'Do you know where the wicked go after death?'
'They go to hell,' was my ready and orthodox answer.
'And what is hell? Can you tell me that?'
'A pit full of fire.'
'And should you like to fall into that pit, and to be burning there forever?'
'No, Sir.'
'What must you do to avoid it?'
I deliberated a moment; my answer, when it did come, was objectionable: 'I must keep in good health, and not die.'"

The Autobiography of Methuselah by John Kendrick Bangs

Title: The Autobiography of Methuselah

Author: John Kendrick Bangs (American, 1862-1922)
Originally published:  1909
Page count: 98


Dates read: 8/14/19 and 8/18/19 (3.5 hours read aloud)
2019 book goal progress: 20 out of 41
Back to the Classics category: Classic Comedy


Read my other book reviews for the challenge HERE.



Description on back of book:
I, Methuselah - George W. Methuselah, that is. I, the oldest man of all time, am setting down my story here. Not in hieroglyphics, mind you, for I am no draftsman. I have chosen English because French, Spanish, and German haven't come into being yet. The reason why I didn't choose Esperanto is contained herein.

Here, for your edification, are my memories of my great, great, great grandfather and grandmother Adam and his madam. (Eve, that is!) The true story of Cain and Abel? Look no further! And you'll want to hear the story of how my father, Enoch, named me. As Granpa Adam might have said, it's a rib-tickler! You'll be treated to my poetry, the genuine tale of my grandson Noah and that damp business with the Ark and... But enough! You're not getting any younger! Read! Enjoy already!

First sentence:
"Having recently passed into what my great-grandson Shem calls my Anecdotage, it has occurred to that perhaps some of the recollections of a more or less extended existence upon this globular mass of dust and water that we are pleased to call the earth, may prove of interest to posterity, and I have accordingly, at the earnest solicitation of my grandson, Noah, and his sons, Shem, Ham, and Japhet, consented to put them into permanent literary form."

Favorite quotes:
"In view of the facts that at this writing, ink and paper and pens have not as yet been invented, I have been compelled to make use of hammer and chisel, to gouge out my 'Few Remarks' upon such slabs of stone as I can find. Let us hope that my story will not prove as heavy as my manuscript."

"I must confess that it has always been a nice question with me whether or not when a man expresses a wish that the rain may be dammed, he voices a desire for its everlasting condemnation, or the mere placing in its way of an impediment which shall prevent its further overflow."

"I think it is undesirable for a young girl to enter too hastily into the obligations of matrimony, or to marry the first man that comes along, unless she is absolutely sure that he is the only man she could possibly endure through three meals a day for the balance of her life."

"When my grandson Noah first began to show signs of mental aberration on the subject of a probable flood that would sweep everything before it, and put the whole world out of business save those who would take shares in his International Marine and Zoo Flotation Company, I endeavored to dissuade him in every possible way from so suspicious an enterprise."

CAWPILE Rating: Overall - 8 - ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Characters      - 9
Atmosphere   - 7
Writing Style - 10
Plot                - 5
Intrigue          - 9
Logic             - 6
Enjoyment     - 10
What is a CAWPILE Rating?

Review:

This is a wonderfully hilarious book! If you try to take it seriously, you won't like it - it's meant to be funny and you can't think it through too much. It has incredibly clever wordplay which often had me (and my husband, who I read it to) laughing. It explains why prehistoric animals such as the dinosaurs, legendary animals such as griffons, and other made-up animals went extinct (spoiler: it's not because of the flood). Methuselah alludes to things that should be invented such as electricity, steam power, cars, and newspapers (he doesn't use those terms).

Bangs wrote the book as if Methusela wrote the autobiography in biblical times, but it still includes a good number of modern references - many of which probably went over my head because 'modern' to Bangs was over a century ago from today - which, though it made the book less logical, greatly increased the humor. For example, there are several mentions of Women's Suffrage, mostly from a spinster and generally negative view - but that was a controversial topic in Bangs time and Methuselah lives in a very patriarchal time period and culture (and it's a comedy style that pokes fun at others - remember: it's not supposed to be taken seriously).

I would highly suggest reading this book, especially if you're familiar with the stories of Adam and Eve, Cain and Abel, and Noah's Ark. The book read like a script for Monty Python (the humor is similar) - so if you like their videos, you'd probably like this book as well.

Now I'm off to read another book... but since a review should be more about the author of the book than about the writer of the blog, I will let John Kendrick Bangs have the last words:

"It was Abel who asked his father why he had not named the male ants uncles, a question to this day has not been satisfactorily answered. Zoology might have been a far simpler science in the matter of nomenclature had Adam been surrounded with inquiring minds like those of Cain and Abel. Why, for instance, should a creature that is found chiefly on the Nile, and never under any circumstances on the Rhine, be called a Rhinoceros? And why should a Caribou be called a Caribou entirely irrespective of sex? There are Caribou of both sexes, when we might have had Caribou for one and Billibou for the other, yet Adam has feminized the whole Bou family with no apparent thought about the matter at all. Then there is the animal which he called the Bear. He is not bare at all - on the contrary, he wears the shaggiest coat of all the animals, except possibly the Buffalo, who, by the way, is not buff, but a rather dirty dull brownish-black in color. The Panther does not wear pants, and the Monkey far from suggesting the habits of a Monk is a roistering, philanderous old rounder that would disgrace a heathen temple, much less adorn a Monastery. And finally, if there is anything lower than a Hyena, or less coy than a coyote, I don't know what is."